Dad: I had to go to one of the porno shops on Dickerson Road to give them a bid. And I had to wait on the manager of the store.
Me: Did he come out of the back room wiping his sticky hands off?
Dad (totally serious): No, he came in the front door.
*Now that I've typed this out, it feels like one of those "you had to be there" moments, but let me tell you, after he said that, my mom and I rolled in the floor laughing.