Wednesday, August 31, 2005

don't worry. i'm not dead...yet

So it's officially been a bit crazy for a while and that would be why there has been no posting done by me. My computer decided to quit working for a while because it hates me. I tried to get it fixed but the computer nerd whom I love and whom has never failed me is in OK City, so I had to rely on a computer nerd whom I've only met once. And let me tell you, he is a computer nerd that has failed me...or so I thought. After I got my computer back from him with his assurances that everything was working as it all should be (and that I did not have enough porn on my computer for his tastes), I still couldn't get my computer to work. But that was of no importance to me because... I WAS GOING TO GATLINBURG, WHICH IS APPARENTLY FULL OF LIVE WILD BEARS (but more on that later). So once I came back, I was more than a little ready for my computer to be fixed. The computer nerd who almost shouldn't be called such took my computer again and said that it was fine. It just so happens that he was WRONG. OR SO I THOUGHT. I got my computer back from him and tried the Internet once, but sadly there was no Internet to be found. So last night, in the midst of all that I was doing to prepare for my new job and everything else (more on that later), my computer nerd who almost shouldn't be called such came over to prove to me that he was RIGHT AND I WAS WRONG. And let me tell you, it only took him two seconds to do just that. He came into my room and sat down (only two feet from my bed...which is the closest he has ever been to a woman's bed...and this could be seen in the cold sweat that quickly broke out on his forehead) and pulled up the Internet. That's right, people. HE PULLED UP THE INTERNET which was something that I had been trying to do for a couple of weeks now. I do believe that he called me a jackass and then punched me in my left testicle for bringing him out in a tropical storm to fix my computer when he had apparently already done it. But that's okay because THE LOSS OF FEELING IN MY LEFT TESTICLE IS TOTALLY WORTH BEING ABLE TO LOOK AT THINGS LIKE THIS ON THE INTERNET.

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