Awkward and awkwarder with a bonus awkwarderer

Awkward: waking up at 6 in the morning and telling your bedmate to get his hands off your boob
Awkwarder: realizing his hand isn't on your boob, but his cat's hand is

Awkward: having a guy that you could have sworn was gay hit on you and then tell him "oh, if only you swung my way"
Awkwarder: being told by him that he does in fact "swing your way"

Awkward: telling your coworker to stop trying to touch your boob
Awkwarder: realizing that he was just reaching for a piece of paper
Awkwarderer: your coworker responds by saying "I can't open my hand that much"

As much as it pains me to say, these are just from the past two days. There will mos def be more to come.